How many poems does it take to screw a lightbulb?

see this thing grew on my face

since I was last here

makes me look angry but

I just wanna be your friend.


I’ll try again. There was this guy named, uh, Dave. But probably not the same Dave your thinking of. Anyhow his Dad was a huge major asshole. Like scum of the earth. Take the biggest asshole you know and now muliply that by a factor of three. Got it?

Now imagine that’s your dad.


So Dave had a job driving an ice cream truck and stuff was ok. Went to the bar got laid and played pinball and thought ’bout poems and comics. But when he walked he had to walk backwards because he didn’t want to walk like his Dad.


I went to a lot of poetry readings. And the poetry pretty much always sucks. If I ever meet a real poet I’ll punch that jerk in the jaw cuz

I bet he’s cheating somehow.

still, it was fun getting here . . .

to the end.

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